DIVORCE – Her Side of the Story

Divorce – it is indeed has become a common word in our fast phased society. Everyone talks about it. Most of them undergo that and many have made it as a quick solution for their issues. It seems simple in the eyes of this new era. It is not more than a law document to be signed for those who have never gone through it. But trust me, it is NOT as it seems to be. It is NOT as easy as everyone thinks. And trust this too when I say, Divorce is a tabooed word for women.

What actually happens when a woman is the victim of this so-called Divorce?  

This article is not to purify women to be the chestiest, nor to blame every man to be the injustice. This is merely to listen to the story ‘SHE’ had to say to the world. This is the ‘VOICE’ of thousands of women out there who chose to LIVE after their calamity. This is ‘HER’ side of the story.

A girl gets into the marriage life with so many dreams, desires, and hopes of a happily ever after. She wants her darling husband to be ‘The Prince Charming’ riding on a white horse carrying a bunch of roses and murmuring ‘I love you sweetheart for the eternity’. Little she knew at that time, those soapy operas only exist in the fairy tales showcased in the Disney world. The life changes upside down when she finds out the prince on the white horse none other than a devil on the horned buffalo. The agony, the phases of depression, the overwhelming sadness, getting cornered from her own family and society, the blame for every single thing goes wrong and labeling her to be unworthy has started to kill her. She was in a slow motion of death. She could no longer take it. She was pushed to a corner where she had to do or die. She knew if she remained with the devil she had to endure a painful death so she looked for other options. There she came across the term – Divorce. But she was warned by her family, friends, and society that the term Divorce is tabooed for women. The taboo of it would destroy her identity in the society. She was warned it would kill her image of a virtuous woman in front of the world. She was warned to be left alone for the rest of her existence.

So she went into a deep silence closing her eyes to the rest of the world. She muted the sounds of her surroundings and she started to listen to her own inner voice. There she was, very deep inside her, she was seeing the light of wisdom. She was in a paradigm shift of embracing the knowledge she never had before – self-respect, self-realization, doing what is best for thyself, the courage to live once again. There she awoke the sleeping cub inside her. She finally opened her eyes – for everyone’s amazement, she smiled. She somehow knew what to be done. She knew she was in a slow-motion self-suicide, so she decided to embrace the tabooed word and if she had to still die, she would do as a martyred of freedom fighter.  

Yes – she went for it. She once again became Ms from Mrs. and thereupon she had to be on her own. There she was after being divorced, realized why the society warned her of the divorce to be tabooed. Along the way she walks, she saw many people staring at her pinpointing her for all the wrongdoings. For every other person she sees, she had to narrate her own story and become a storyteller. Day by day the story became her mantra. She even can tell the story while multi-tasking. She has become the hot news in the town and everyone has their own amusing questions to ask her. There she was, who has become an entertainer for many people’s bedtime story. Her family has become mentally agonized to secure the life of their ‘Divorcee Girl’ with another right man. The financial burden has inflicted and the society has started to spit at her.

There she went to her meditation once again. Closed the eyes from the world and listened to her inner voice. There she heard that she had no other option other than standing out, marching forward and fight what may come in her way. So that she became ‘A Wonder Woman’. And yes NOW she is……………………..,

She is Strong
Society has put her down multiple times. Everyone who said they would stay left her. Who offered help, only took advantages of her. The prince she believed turned into a devil whose tortures were brutal. She was left alone in a pit filled with shits of people of her own. She had to clean the stinking pit every other day and she had enough of it. No one considered her as a human being. No one came to her aid. So she became her own aid. She became stronger and stronger every day and one fine day she broke the walls of the pit she was in to find her own salvation. And there she was – blamed by the society to be a bad trait, arrogant brat for standing on her own. And yes now she knows to remain strong no matter who says what.

She is Fierce
Men in her life started using her, abusing her, taunting her and made her life miserable. She was drawn in fear of rejection. She was shown a side of life which was stinking. It really was stinking where no man could even imagine placing his feet. So finally she stood up for her. She became fearless as she has already endured enough pain. Nothing more can shake her up. She became unimaginably fierce. And there is this wonderful society labeled her to be shameless for facing life and standing up for her redemption. And yes now she knows enough to ignore those negative talkers.

She Smiles
She starts to smile more often. Her smile was radiant. She starts to talk more about her passion. She now sees beautiful colors of the world. Once upon a time, the man in her life only showed her black and white. There were times she cried endless nights and faked a smile in the next morning. The burden she was carrying was too heavy for her shoulders and finally, she decided to be free. So she smiled. The charm of her smile was like a good fine slap on the face of those who made her life a living hell. And here she is now a woman with no feelings for the so-called society. She just turned back because she doesn’t care anymore what this society says.

She is building up
Now that she is free and had to feed herself on her own. She starts to revisit her passion. She dresses up, marches out to give life to her passion. She starts to earn. There she is slowly yet steadily building her up. Her courage is amazing. She had no trace of remorse. She even didn’t remember she was once a prisoner. She is unstoppable now. And yes yes yes the society once again accused her to be unchaste. But she knew none of them would come to give even a piece of bread when she is hungry.

She is living once again
Now that she had found herself, she has fallen in love. Yes, she has fallen in love with herself. With her ambitions, with her passion, with the people who stood by her, with the beautiful colors of the world, with the smell of the soil behind her house, with that mouthwatering cheese cake she baked a while ago, with the creamy pizza she cheated to eat while on the diet, with the new haircut she just had, with the shape of her body after spending hours in the gym, with the waves of the beach where she went on vacation, with her smile which was beautiful when looking herself in the mirror. Yes, she is living once again. And now the society knew she doesn’t give a damn about anything they say. And now they knew she is unstoppable.

How sad sometimes where this society often blames a divorcee and corner her, accuse her and label her as if she brings misfortunes if she decided to free herself. The journey is not easy for her. Even she wanted to live a life filled with love and acceptance. But fate was not merciful on her. She had no other option other than taking matters to her own hand.
And it is not necessary that a divorcee should remain in her shackle even after she is set free. She has the right to live as she wants in a modest and acceptable way by the religion she follows. But no religion set boundaries to pursue their dreams. 

It is a woman who carries a life within bearing most difficult pain to give life to another. It is she who becomes the blessed daughter, a wonderful wife, and a lovable mother. And trust me when I say this – these wonderful ladies can move mountains when required.
If the society she lives in cannot create a way for her wellbeing. Then at least stay away from her path. She is strong enough to create a way for her.

All the brave women out there who chose to live after their divorces – Eureka, you got the secret recipe to live. And all the ladies out there struggling to find a way out – please know this – you are brave enough to stand up on your own. Awake the wonder woman in you and your life will become wonderful.